Thursday, November 19, 2009

The boat elf

We couldn’t believe it when we managed to take this picture of the boat elf that lives on Chocobo. Everybody knows they exist but nobody ever caught one on picture or even saw one! Let me explain a bit more here. You see every sailor knows that there are two elves living on a boat. The first one is the boat goblin and the preferred game of this little rascal is to break things on your boat. This little creature is evil and extremely good at hiding itself in the smallest spaces on your boat where you can’t catch him and throw him overboard. He would go during the night and gnaw on your electrical wire inside the electronic equipments so next time you use a device, which was perfectly working the day before, would just not work and this, of course, while you are trying to get the anchor out or rising a sail with the electrical which that one of a sudden becomes manual. We all know that things don’t break just like that! The only explanation is the boat goblin. But sometimes the boat goblin gets bored at breaking things and becomes more sophisticated. He will then play with the electrical wire so your refrigerator would stop working but as soon as you start looking at the problem it starts to work again! Or he would put salt on the gas knob of your BBQ so it doesn’t turn anymore. Sometimes, while on the way, he will get into the autopilot control box and spin the compass so your boat makes a 90° turn for no reasons. And I am not getting in telling you what he does when he gets into the engine room otherwise I will need two pages!But this picture is not one of the boat goblin but of the other elf living on a boat; the boat elf. This elf is the opposite of the boat goblin. This is the one that fixes everything the boat goblin broke. He’s a very busy elf and works probably as much as Santa’s elves. All the time, the boat elf would work at opening the walls of the boat to access the broken equipments and try to figure out what the hell the boat goblin did this time. He would cramp himself in the engine compartment or stand feet over head to access a piece of pluming that would never be in a convenient and accessible place! But to do his repair the boat elf needs money so without you realizing it or could do anything about it he would suck out of your wallet a couple of thousand dollars just like that, pouf, gone! One particularity about this is that the amounts of money he takes are always in thousands of dollars never $8.99 or $34.99 hell no! In this case we caught the boat elf in picture just before he was going to sand the old paint off the hull and because the paint is green and when you sand the dust gets all over you then at the end of the day he was little green elf!